Why am I writing this blog?

Euclid (Cleveland), Ohio, United States
Here I share the amazing spiritual journey I began on July 19, 2007. I received the diagnosis of a golf-ball-sized tumor on top of the left parietal lobe (motor functions) of my brain. I had severe symptoms all up and down the right side of my body and had received an MRI scan of my brain. In August 2007, I learned that my diagnosis was a Glioblastoma Multiforme (GBM). This is a common form of fast-growing brain cancer with a challenging prognosis. That's the external story about that moment in time. In the spiritual world I found (actually more like it found me) what I came to call the Fact-Based Spirit-Guided Path, and I began an amazing journey. After October of 2008, I lost the use of my right arm, and in early 2009, my cognitive abilities were struggling, and treatment options ended. My wife, Susanne, then began doing most of the blog postings, with my review and input whenever possible. I continued to apply the Fact-Based Spirit-Guided Path as the adventure continued. My soul then flew to the Kingdom of God on July 1, 2009. Thanks for your interest in my journey. Craig

Susanne's Perspective

During this entire journey, my wife, Susanne, had an entirely different kind of experience. Initially she added comments to some of my posts describing her experience of the moments I discussed and offerred perspectives on our relationship. In the latter stage of this journey, she is writing the blog, as I am no longer able to do so. I am truly delighted that she is doing so. Susanne and I work together as marriage educators/relationship coaches and she has written many books on preparing for and strengthening marriages so you can count on her comments to be insightful and poignant.

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Week 4 of Second Phase of Treatment: January 20 to 26

When we saw the surgeon again on Wednesday, he was dismayed that the infection on my scalp was still active after the antibiotics and instructed that the planned chemotherapy treatment for the week of January 28 should not happen. My low white blood counts are clearly making it difficult to fight the infection, and chemo would lower the counts further. However, Dr. Sloan indicated that delaying the chemotherapy for a short time is not a major concern as my MRI scans have continued to show no visible tumor growth. He offered me surgery as an option again, which I declined. He then prescribed silvadene cream to be applied twice daily with the wound to be left open to the air as much as possible. The situation will be reevaluated next week.

If the doctors had recognized the infection in December, when we first brought the head swelling to their attention, the first round of chemotherapy would, most likely, have also been delayed so that my body’s immune system could deal with the infection first. You may recall that my white blood cells (immune system indicator) dropped dramatically after the end of the radiation/chemotherapy treatments in Oct./Nov. and have stayed low since. My T-cell count (lymphocytes), another part of the immune system, has also been low since then as well. The neutrophil and platelet levels have somewhat recovered, but the red blood cell related counts are still lower than normal too, to which I attribute my continued fatigue (I need a nap every afternoon). I’m also starting to realize that some of the medications I’m on may be contributing to the fatigue as well.

I’m noticing that I felt much more engaged in the treatment when it was daily. The long periods between chemo sessions make it harder to feel engaged. I’m aware that losing concentration on healing though is unwise…there are still months ahead of concentrated cancer-fighting to go.

Other notable events of the week:

  • We went to Pennsylvania to have treatments from my sister (ortho-bionomy) and her colleague Jeanie Anderson. We really felt well taken care of as we headed home. It was great to be able to do most of the driving!!
  • I participated in another hypnotherapy session, that I tape-recorded, to reinforce my new plan for this phase of the treatment.
  • Our monthly Spiritual Oasis devotional meeting was on the theme of the oneness of mankind and love. At Toastmasters the next evening, I then led the group in extemporaneous brief talks about race unity and Martin Luther King.
  • We launched efforts to write a book that would share anecdotes and short stories from both us and many others about how cancer has affected people’s marriages and how their marriage has supported the cancer experience or grown through it. We are welcoming submissions. (The details are at the link above.)
  • We registered for the spring retreat at the ECaP Health and Wellness Center. I am really looking forward to connecting with this organization. Its work has supported my commitment to being an exceptional cancer patient and approaching cancer in a very empowered way.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

The rest of the story…

The trip to Pennsylvania was different for me this time. Nancy had time to do a full ortho-bionomy treatment on me too, and Jeanie spent over an hour checking me out. She discovered that I have five small stones in my pancreas, so I’m now on a treatment of taking daily apple cider vinegar in juice to dissolve them. She also noted that while my thyroid medication is effective, there is some additive in it my body doesn’t like. Probably nothing I can do about that, though! My adrenals, which were “flat as a pancake” in December from stress and exhaustion, had rebounded to 80% functioning. Jeanie also checked out all of our supplements and made adjustments for both of us. We left with a bag of his, hers, and ours—the ones neither of us should take!

Tuesday was a treat for me as well. Someone special paid for me to spend the entire day at a local spa for a pedicure, massage, whirlpool, facial, and delicious lunch. I just relaxed, chatted with other people, wrote notes about a book in progress, reflected, relaxed, relaxed, relaxed…. Lovely gift.

It was frustrating to be at Dr. Sloan’s again and have him still squeezing pus from Craig’s head. Craig and I started discussing that maybe we were spending too much energy resisting what is happening and just need to accept it. Maybe then it will go away! We are going back down to Florida in mid-February escorting our mothers…we want the head healed and chemo done before going!

I did a speech at Toastmasters for the first time since May 2007. It felt good to be back up front doing one. My topic was “My Life As a Bag Lady”. I took in my briefcase, gym bag, short-doctor visit bag, backpack, bag of pills, bag of files, bag of first aid supplies, and bag of plastic bags. I was delighted people laughed throughout. My presentation style is generally quite serious, so I’m working on including more humor.

Friday was a unique experience. I went down to WCPN radio, the local NPR (National Public Radio) affiliate to be interviewed about our book A Perfectly Funny Marriage: A Humorous View of Creating a Successful Marriage. Eric Wellman, the interviewer, also touched on the interesting mix of launching a cartoon book while dealing with Craig’s cancer diagnosis. The interview was 30 minutes long, but it will be edited down to about 4 minutes for airing in February. Fun to do.

We attended a meditation session Friday evening focused on the purity of the heart. We hadn’t attended one since November, probably something else that contributed to December’s stress level. It used this quotation as the focus: O SON OF SPIRIT! My first counsel is this: Possess a pure, kindly and radiant heart, that thine may be a sovereignty ancient, imperishable and everlasting. (Baha'u'llah, The Hidden Words #1). The leader also had us focus on what we have to detach ourselves from in this world to be able to truly have a pure heart. Very insightful discussion followed.

So, it was an uplifting and healthful week punctuated by pus-filled moments!