Back in the Hospital

Unfortunately by Monday morning the incision was looking no better and I was having constant headaches so, at the recommendation of our GP, we headed back to the Emergency Room Monday morning…rats!!! Once again we learned that being a patient means having patience…nine hours there before they got me into a room on the neurological ward, a lot of it without food or medicine. Actually, it was a bit strange to be set up in one of the rooms on the ward that my son stayed in back in March for his tumor removal.

I had noted in my post for August 24, “I promised Susanne that if I was feeling sad or depressed or had any other negative emotions that I would share them with her and not just deny them. One of the concerns she’s expressed about the fact-based spirit-guided path is that, from her perspective, it appears to be an avoidance of any emotions besides happiness.” Well she got to hear me being not so happy and accepting of what was going on…particularly fasting for 24 hours and then discomfort and pain after the surgery, since they tightened my scalp up even more. The first approach of pain medications was not working either. I was also pretty straightforward with most of the folks that called me: I was grumpy! It was very different going through surgery and recovery without steroids influencing the experience too. Wednesday night they changed the pain-meds so by Thursday morning I was feeling better and was discharged Thursday afternoon.

It was interesting to note that, for this follow-up surgery they shaved a larger area and it’s now very clear that the letter “C” for “Craig” is carved on my head and will be the shape of the scar that is left. You may not want to look at this picture if the sight of blood makes you queasy. In this second surgery, they had to pull my scalp in even tighter so the pain is more present than from the initial surgery. Of course, I’m also not on steroids. After the initial surgery, I needed only an occasional Tylenol. This time, I need real pain medication. The first one they started me on didn’t work so they had to switch to an alternative (Darviset). I’m continuing to take it, as needed, and trying to keep the intervals as long as possible.

There were several things that got cancelled due to this further hospital adventure. By the way, I’ve had people comment on my use of the word adventure vs. adversity or ordeal. What I’m seeing is that the choice of the word used to describe something like this contributes to how it occurs. I am consciously choosing to call the further hospital stay and the further treatments called for by the pathology report “further adventures” instead of more adversity or ordeal. And…it was a challenge when this adventure cancelled these plans for the week:

1. I was to participate in a Euclid City Diversity Team meeting on Tuesday morning.
2. Our first cancer support group sessions for patients and family members at The Gathering Place were to happen on Tuesday evening.
3. I had placed a call to a hot air balloon ride provider over the weekend for us to be doing a dawn ride on Thursday or Friday.
4. We were to have a devotional prayer meeting at our home Wednesday evening where friends were coming to pray with us for healing.
5. I was to participate in a Toastmaster’s contest on Thursday.
6. My first “Three Tools of Healing” dramatic presentation was to be Friday, August 31 at Barbara Baumgartner’s home. I was really looking forward to this and had already purchased a wireless microphone to plug into her sound system. Up until Thursday morning, when it became clear to us that the IV infusions every 12 hours were going to be time consuming, we were still considering this a go. The first “Three Tools of Healing” dramatic presentation is now going to be Saturday, September 8 at Emma Jackson’s.
7. I had to miss three of my outpatient rehabilitation sessions when they were just getting fully going.

I was very disappointed to miss these activities. It is important to me to be leading as normal a life as I can while I’m healing.