Friday, August 10, 2007
Preparation for the Hospital
Dr. Cummins than asked what he wanted me to do. I reached over to the dresser and picked up the business card of Dr Andrew Sloan, Neurosurgeon, University Hospital and read it off to him. I would like to be referred to this doctor.
ASIDE: If it seems a bit odd to you that I would have such a card on my dresser it is because this is the doctor that had removed a baseball sized tumor from the front of my son, David's, brain in March. His symptoms manifested themself as seizures that began 6 hours after the birth of his son Aidan.
Meanwhile my wife retrieved the negatives from the back of card and brought them upstairs. Didn't take much at all to spot the golf ball...it was real clear and right up near the surface. Here's the conclusions of the lab report.
We paused for a moment and she held me in her arms. I cried a few tears and we went downstairs to our family room where we normally share our morning prayers. We said some prayers and I said something like "Sweetheart, it looks like I'm going to be out of the the house for some time. What do you need from me?"
Those that are acquainted with Susanne and I will attest to the fact that we tend to get pretty intentional about getting things done and prioritizing. In short order, we had a short prioritized list. The primary item had to do with handling our personal and business finances, which has been my responsibility. We run a marriage education/relationship coaching business out of our home and Susanne writes wonderful books on preparation for marriage and marriage strengthening . We currently have inventory of 4 different books in our basement/distribution center with orders coming in from customers and distributors world-wide. I'd also been handling the shipping. Fortunately Susanne had been involved in enough of that she needed no training.
We devoted several hours that night and the next morning to having me in the co-pilot seat as she navigated, and made notes, in various Quicken accounts and password protected websites to manage the finances, pay bills, etc . Susanne has a deep love for words and is not nearly as comfortable with unmbers. You see, I am so comfortable with numbers that I sometimes enjoy what I call Recreational Spreadsheeting. She picked it up very well although she does have a folder with transactions she wants me to verify.
On Thursday, I also called my son:
"Guess what son, I got one too."
"One what?"
"Brain tumor."
"NO."
"YES!!! Golf ball....up top!"
"Your kiddin' me?"
"Nope."
It was a wonderful bonding moment that I will cherish forever.
Call came from Dr Sloan's office mid-Friday AM "The doctor will be pleased to see you next Wednesday at 10 AM."
I explained my current physical symptoms and asked if that could be moved up.
She indicated that she would call me back. When she did so she said to head down the the ER to get admitted.
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3 comments:
Hi Craig:
I haven’t been able to visit or call but I have been able to keep up with your health issues via Suzanne’s postings to Yahoo Groups. I went thru a similar ordeal back in 1971 that eventually led me to investigating our beloved Faith and my acceptance.
I wish you every success in overcoming this physical difficulty and pray that the Will of God be done for you.
Best wishes, also, for a speedy recovery process.
John Krochmalny
Dear Craig,
I can completely understand the "recreational spreadsheeting" (in fact, I got up early this morning to do some!). Ha!
I am so happy that you will be sharing here what you have learned during this intense period. Our family is so thankful that you are recovering and that you are able to bring to the world the gift that you have received!
Lots of love,
liz davis (et. al.)
The rest of the story...
I could tell the news was bad as I sat on the bed and listened to Craig take the call from the doctor. After Craig told me the news, I started to jump up and go into action, but I paused, sat back down, and held him. I asked him what he needed and held him while he cried and we prayed. The fax of the MRI report came through to us. We looked at the MRI we had brought home, amazed that the tumor was so visible to us.
Then we had to start telling the family and planning what to do. It was very difficult listening to Craig connect with his son about the tumor. I was left feeling like the bonding was good, but wondering about the impact on all of us of the two family tumors so close together. We contacted his sister and asked her to tell their mother as they live nearby to each other in Pennsylvania. Calls were made to Craig’s three children and to my daughter. Another to Craig’s Aunt Jean. The shock was beginning to reverberate within the family. And the denial…
It was up to me to review our wills and power-of-attorney documents…Craig couldn’t deal with it. There were vital changes to make quickly…with a lawyer who recently lost his son to a brain tumor.
We realized quickly that while I was roughly familiar with our personal and business finances, the intricacies of online banking and bill paying and of our business were totally unknown to me. Under ordinary circumstances having Craig teach me such complex stuff that he knows so well would be challenging…with the mental slowdown of shock and stress, it was quite a challenge. (Note from the present: I’m happy to report that I haven’t bounced a single check, have paid lots of bills, and while slow, I’ve felt very empowered to learn these new skills! My problem now is keeping Craig’s fingers out of it now that he’s home…I’m determined to learn this properly first!)
My daughter, Jennifer, made prompt plans to come to town from where she lives in Florida with her newlywed husband…she knows me well and knew I’d need someone to watch my wellbeing while I watched Craig’s. She got laundry and cleaning done, helped me make effective to-do lists, looked after Craig’s Mom once she came to town, reminded me to eat and rest, and helped hold me together. It got me started well for the rest of the journey.
Craig was determined that his daughters Leah and Michelle did not come to town immediately so that they could be in Washington DC for Leah’s graduation from massage therapy school. His ticket regretfully had to be cancelled. This timing was a challenge, but their presence after the surgery was great.
Craig’s sister Nancy brought my mother-in-law to town when we thought the surgery would happen. However, the surgery kept being postponed day after day, and she ended up staying at our home for a week…a challenge for her to be away from home that long. However, her presence here was such a blessing. She lifted Craig’s spirits, bonded with Jennifer, and provided funds for food, lawn mowing, and whatever was required each day.
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